Meet Aaron!
1) Tell us a little bit about yourself!
Hello, folks! Aaron Ach here. I’m a mid-20s, Washington, D.C. transplant, working as a researcher and consultant in cybersecurity. I come from just outside of Chicago, identify as a gay friend, brother, and son, and the pronouns I use are he, him, and his. I like to read, write, drink, dance, and cook. I’m not particularly great at the latter two.
I’m really excited about having gotten connected with Worthy, and specifically by the opportunity to serve on the Empowerment Council. My experiences as a gay man have coincided with activist efforts, first as an advocate for LGBTQIA+ -inclusive sexual education in Illinois public high schools and more recently in attempts to promote more healthy collegiate athletics team cultures for LGBTQIA+ -identified team members. Given that Worthy Mentoring is a platform and a network, I view it as having high potential to help mentees in specific kinds of environments, such as college athletics, to connect with with and learn from those who have navigated similar environments.
2) As we start the new year, do you recommend any LGBTQ+ books, movies or TV Shows?
Books:
Call Me by Your Name (Andre Aciman, 2008)
When I speak about my own queerness, I tend to focus on how and where an identity locates me in a broader social fabric. Sometimes I need a reminder that my identity as a gay person is about who I love before it is about my politics. Call Me by Your Name re-trained my focus on that very fact. Elio’s longing for a more mature, confident Oliver gnaws, forcing Elio to reimagine himself with powerful feelings for Oliver as a part of his being. How Elio and Oliver negotiate an age discrepancy, feelings perhaps unrequited, and the family made this story almost as instructive as it was beautiful. In addition to the prose being extraordinary, it was one of those books that toppled some of the walls I had put up over the years.
Movies:
Palmer (2021)
Based on a true story, this movie is about a gender non-conforming fourth-grader, Sam, who finds an unlikely friend and caretaker in Palmer—a shielded, upstanding-but-troubled ex- convict (played by Justin Timberlake). For very different reasons, Palmer’s identity as shaped by tough experiences is as complex and non-normative as Sam’s. As they grow more comfortable with one another, and as Palmer becomes a more adept mentor, the labels assigned to them by the outside world matter less and less. There’s an implicit message in the movie that hits home: each of us are complex for a host of reasons, but the best way to heal and be healed is to stay open, especially at the times when the impulse to disengage is strongest. Over the course of the movie, it becomes clear that they have rescued one another from grim futures.
Current News/Articles:
In the US: In a very large survey of over 15,000 American adults, more than 7 percent identified as LGBTQIA+. That surge is driven by Gen Z adults, over 20 percent of which self- identified as LGBTQIA+. The 7.1 percent figure is up 1.5 percent from those who self-identified in a 2020 poll, and stands to increase further as more Gen Z reach adulthood. I firmly believe we need to do a better job of equipping students to healthily navigate LGBTQIA+ identities around the age at which they identify. Unfortunately, family dynamics, educators beholden to state politics, and other factors often limit the availability of resources to LGBTQIA+ youth. The need for adult-adult mentoring is, therefore, all the more necessary, and I am proud of Worthy Mentoring for the part it plays in meeting that growing need.
Abroad: Following Russian military action in Ukraine, uncertainty looms for the LGBTQ+ community in a country that had made significant strides toward democracy prior to Russian incursion. The Kremlin has wielded politicized homophobia as a means of anti-Western, anti- democratic influence in Russia. As Moscow aims to turn a legitimately democratic Ukraine into a failed state, Putin will criminalize LGBT behavior (i.e., sexual activity), speech, and identified individuals. The list of Ukrainian political enemies Moscow has publicly committed to send to internment camps is also likely to include known LGBTQIA+ individuals.
3) What about any advice for LGBTQ+ individuals finding their voice and identity in the community?
Write it down - I think of a pen and paper as a set of brakes on my mind. When I get worked up about something, it’s usually because I’m thinking in terms of feelings—like shame—rather than with words. By putting myself in the position of needing to assign words to some of those feelings, I’m able to better understand what other problems might be feeding into the one I set out to describe. I also better equip myself to talk about the problem(s) in a comprehensible way with those in my inner circle by having done a bit of a first draft on them. A lot of people think that writing it down takes too much time, which I can understand. It may be a commitment in the moment, but it makes any reflection I do significantly more effective and efficient.
A community, if you can listen for it - The LGBTQ+ Community is a big, decentralized thing. It’s more a fabric of stories than a dance club that you’re given automatic entrance to because you identify as a particular letter. In that sense, we have to be willing to listen to one another’s stories and share some of our own if we want to feel plugged into the community (which is damn worth it). Whether it’s trying to land a date or making new friends, it’s much more likely to go well if you seem interested in actually learning about the other person and perceive them to be interested in learning about you.
4) Any specific individuals or groups we should be following on social media?
More dog accounts. Period. Real talk: Instead of spending more time considering who you need to be following on social media, spend some time unfollowing the accounts that don’t make you feel good about yourself. Even if someone is “goals,” having a window into the lifestyle, body, or skills you think you want tomorrow isn’t worth adverse impacts to your mental health today. I’ve been trying to do this recently and confess that it has helped me alter my relationship with Insta, the platform I engage with most.